The best thing about THE BATMAN is the villains.

Matt Reeves’ three hour belfry tour through a Gothic Gotham serves up three vile felons for the caped crusader to bif, zap and pow with.

Colin Farrell is a fabulously oily bird in his characterisation of Oswald Cobblepot, aka The Penguin. His physicality and vocalisation delivers an outstandingly outlandish character. He has the best dialogue in the picture, the funniest lines, and he delivers.

Paul Dano is genuinely creepy as the unhinged as Edward Nashton, aka The Riddler, a psychotic last chance gasp, a survival jump suit Trump who doesnt want to drain the swamp as much as swamp the corruption blocked drain the city has become.

Less comic book is Carmine Falcone, the all too human, urbane, and apparently normal businessman who has cops and politicians in his pocket. John Turturro plays him with hard, chilling, brutal reality.

The Batman is played by Robert Pattinson, a brooding brat with mumbling delivery redolent of Brando. This brat man is a thug pugilist with anger management issues. He’s also a pretty good detective. Ditch the cowl and set the scowl free.

The Batman, aka Bruce Wayne is a sullen man child, a moneyed orphan who likes to play dress up and belt miscreants up. His nanny is a butler called Alfred, played by Andy Sirkus, who alludes to his pre Jeevesian life as part of the Circus, a euphemism for the British security service made famous by John Le Carre.

The real sizzle in THE BATMAN is The Catwoman, played with sinewy sensuality, and sassy, feline finesse by Zoe Kravitz. The screen craves it.

Stylistically, visually and narratively, THE BATMAN derives from a bat cave of references and begins as an Old Testament vengeance story before transforming into a New Testament tale, with The Batman having a road to to Damascus eye opening.

THE BATMAN becomes a parable for our times – dark, despairing and a bit of a dirge.